Lessons We're Trying to Teach Our Children

What is the most important thing we can teach our children? For each person, there is probably a different answer, or set of answers to that question. My wife and I have discussed some of the things we want to teach our children while they are in our care. Some of those things we want to teach our children are character issues, life skills, and values. Here is a list of some of those lessons we are teaching our four-year-old son and two-year-old daughter.

            Use your words, not your fists.  It’s easy to react when someone hurts you or says something hurtful about you. But the violent reaction is seldom the best reaction.

            Money doesn’t grow on trees. Yeah, we heard it from our parents, but it’s a valuable lesson. We try to explain to our children that each purchase we make is the result of mom and dad working hard to earn money for us. Which brings us to …

            Always give your best. We are trying to instill a strong work ethic in our children. We’re trying to show them that they must work hard to get the things in life they want most. They are not entitled to everything simply because they are charming.

            Take responsibility for your actions. We know that our kids will make mistakes. We, however, are trying to teach them to be responsible for their actions. It’s not easy. It’s easier to cast blame on someone else, or on some situation over which you had “no control.”  This would also involve taking responsibility for finances and apologizing when you have hurt someone else.

            Treat people with respect. We may not like everyone we meet, and we may not always agree with everything they say or do, but we must respect them as people. God created each person as image-bearers of Him. We should not tarnish that image with disrespect.

            Help others when you can. As a family, we sponsor a young boy through World Vision. We exchange letters and photos with him. When our children ask why we are friends with him, we try to teach them that since God has given us much, we are compelled to help others, including our young friend.

            Ask questions and be ready to learn. This is not a difficult lesson to teach our children. They are inquisitive (and brilliant, if I may assert my humble analysis). We never know where their questions will lead us, and we have made many Google searches to find out the answers to their questions.

            Read a lot.  We go to the library frequently. We read fiction, and non-fiction with the kids. We have even been reading Little House in the Big Woods. Even though I was concerned that the kids might not be able to sit and listen to a book that is written for an older child, they have surprised me with their interest in the book.

            Respect your elders. Yeah, we’re traditionalist in this respect. We teach our children to call adults “Miss Kim” or “Mr. Mike.” If either child talks back to Mom, I quickly reprimand them and tell them that we will not tolerate such disrespect in our home.

            Use your manners. It may not be in vogue, but we always say “please” and “thank you.” It’s just the right thing to do. Which brings us to …

            Our family always does what is right.  Even if it is difficult, or results in friends making fun of you, you are to do what is right. Sometimes, our children have watched their parents’ example of this principle, even when it has hurt us, or has been costly to us.

            Tell the truth. Telling the truth can come at a great cost, but it is something we must do. This was the hardest lesson for me to learn as a child, and I still am tempted to tell an expedient lie. But, the truth is always better, and easier than a lie.

            Love God. We never want to force our faith on our children, but we are trying to teach them that God loves them, and we are praying that they will love God in return. We also pray that they will one day be followers of Jesus.

            We are not perfect parents. Sometimes, unfortunately, our children learn as we make mistakes and ask forgiveness from others, or take responsibility for wrong choices we make. But, those may be some of the best moments of learning we can give to our kids. I’m sure there are more lessons to be taught, and there are certainly more that we are trying to teach our children. What are we forgetting? Let me know.