Telling the Truth

“You are of your father the devil, and your will is to do your father’s desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, and has nothing to do with the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks out of his own character, for he is a liar and the father of lies.” John 8:44

I try to teach my children to tell the truth. I have told them that we are always to do what is right, and that includes telling the truth.

This week, the lesson was put to the test. Each week, my son has a scrimmage game at the end of his hockey practice. On this night, he was on the team that was winning. The score was 8-2. Practice time was ending, so the coach had the kids face off at center ice and said, “The score is tied 6-6. The next goal wins the game.” The other team scored the final and deciding goal.

As the kids were leaving the rink, some parents congratulated their kids on “winning the game.” 

“They’re lying,” my son told me. “My team won. We scored more goals.”

“Yes,” I told him, “I know.”

But the banter continued, and my son was upset. So, on the walk back to my car, I tried to explain to him what was happening. I told him that since his team was doing so well, and the other team was not doing well, the coach simply tried to encourage the other team by claiming the game was tied.

“But, it wasn’t tied, he was lying,” my son responded.

“Well, yes, he was, but he was just trying to encourage those kids. He didn’t want them to be upset and feel bad about themselves and never come back to hockey practice. He was just trying to make them feel better,” I replied.

“Well, they were lying. And if they lie again, I’m not going back to hockey ever again.”

At that moment, I knew that what I had said, as rational as it may have been, was the wrong thing to say. He was right. What the coach had said was not true. While it was “harmless” it was nevertheless a lie. My son was right to be upset about that.

“You’re right,” I told my son. “It would have been better if the coach had said, ‘The next goal wins the game’ rather than saying that the score was tied.” 

He agreed. You see, he would not have cared if after outscoring the other team, he had lost so long as the loss came from that rule than from an outright untruth.

The incident reaffirmed to me that telling the truth is important. It reaffirmed that I am right to teach my children that lying is wrong. But, it also showed me that standing up for what is right and true can at times be difficult. Was the coach’s lie a harmless one. Sure. But, my son is right; it was a lie, and that is wrong. 

The final lesson I learned from this incident is that our children are constantly watching us, and listening to us. Remember this. Do your actions match up with the words you say? Your children will know.

God affirms the truth. His son, Jesus, is the truth. And Jesus tells us that the adversary is a liar and the father of lies. God commands us in the Ninth Commandment that, “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.” This commandment has certain application in upholding the truth in a trial or courtroom setting. But, it also clearly implies that our words are to be true – without deception. Telling the truth is not always easy, but as my son showed me this week, it is always right. 

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